mix matched words

just hear me out.

i have words flying so freely in and out of my mind i can barely think.

we live to keep up with the times it seems, you can always be connected to people anywhere in the world at anytime. hell everything these days is portable, no need for a house just as long as you can steal free internet every here and there you're set.

people ache and pain over bills, too much money going out not enough coming in, prices going up, people losing their jobs, losing their mind, paying for outrageous health care, when nobody really cares.

i am a human, although my emotions are slightly robotic, i am a human.

i feel, need, want, crave. 

I do what everyone does, i'm guilty of basking in the glory of technological breakthroughs.

however i'm sitting in a chair looking out the window, in my own reality of sorts. 

people are so fucked up because we don't know what we're doing anymore.

we took all simple, basic, life skills and put a microchip and price tag on it.

have you sat in the woods lately? looked around breathed the air, it may be tainted but it's better than that city smog that makes your eyes burn.

have you watched the sun rise lately, actually felt the day enter the earth like it was meant to happen, put away yesterday with a zip of the sky but brought in a new day with a breathe of fresh, ready to fight, ready to welcome what the day will bring.

have you watched the sun go down lately? the way the sky fills with color on the edge of explosion, as the days last heat slowly fades into black on the pavement.

i feel like nature and everything natural has a way of sucking me into a whole different world, it recharges me and heals my heavy mind.

i've been spending so much time hiking, and being outdoors as the nice weather slowly creeps up, and i am so thrilled for summer, thrilled to make a positive change in the person i am, and am becoming.

i wish people still lived in a world where we worked for necesity and surviving was what life was. 

take your robots, turn them off, hide them for all i care,

and i ask you to step outside

feel the sun, the way it hugs you as if it knew your name.

i'm frustrated, happy and have a lot on my mind, i can't type fast enough, nor think fukk thoughts so i'm done here.

good evening friends.

sun burn

 Still smokeless, still going strong.

 detoxing starts tomorrow.

i'm going to make myself feel so good it will pain me to do so.

i'm done being on edge with everyone else when i'm just frustrated with myself.

in the end everyone will win.

i'm exhausted.

short story long

short;

my life is time spent working in and out of ways to support my addictive habits.

long;

i quit smoking cigarettes yesterday, today i found two rolling around my purse and now i'm at a loss. i've been trying for weeks to tell myself to just do it and kick the habit, and now i'm ready to. and i think i am finally over my alcohol abuse era, that's just one more thing i do not need in my life right now. i'm going to start a detox tomorrow and get myself feeling back to normal, and healthy. a good way too start this spring/summer. this year is going to be busy, busy. i have so much i want to do, i am really going to focus on the whole art thing and figure exactly what i want to do with myself. blah. blah. i'm excited though, i'm planning many trips to pack everybody up and take them on a week of making a project throughout the landscape of somewhere else.

i'm tired, talking circles about nothings and nonsense. 

see you around stranger.